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Est. 1998
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Terri Guillemets
Archives — 2023
This page is the archive of my public writings and journals from 2023 — the good, the bad, the active and the retired. Some entries were originally untitled with a title added later. Anything that has been modified since original publication, even if just the title or one piece of punctuation, is marked with a 'revised' note.
after a lifetime of doing almost nothing
but collecting words, now — here i am
finding that my life has become all about
that which cannot be expressed in words —
after a half-life of a burning desire to write
in order to find myself, suddenly i've found
an even more impassioned desire to write
by leaving that moulten shell behind, and
in this moment i know — silence is poetry
when the poet has nothing more to say
TITLE: Silence in the poet
DATE: 2023 Jan 2
Silence is poetry
when the poet
has nothing more to say
TITLE: Silence in the poet
DATE: 2023 Jan 2
January sundown —
I go out hoping for
spectacular colors
as we Arizonans are
accustomed to —
but tonight there is
just beautiful clear
simplicity of pale blue
sky with a streak of
soft alabaster clouds
it's okay, though —
I could never be
disappointed, with
this crisp cool air
and winter quiet —
I watch the edges
of tall palms wave
ever so gently —
and all else is still
save my beating heart
TITLE: Be still
DATE: 2023 Jan 8
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
reading in my cozy bed, ridiculously late
words begin to slur and rhymes, to blear
my eyelids fight me — like a heavyweight
goodnight, sweet sleepy zzzzzhakespeare
TITLE: Zzzzzhakespeare
DATE: 2023 Jan 13
in this day and age
dealing with health insurance
worst disease of all
“All complaints about life today will be ignored unless they are submitted in the format of elegant haiku poetry.”
TITLE: $ick
DATE: 2023 Jan 19
NOTES: senryu poem
she was wandering
completely lost —
yet on the path
the whole time
TITLE: Wondering
DATE: 2023 Jan 20
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
they say I am sensitive
and that I'm not tough —
enough. but — I made
it this far — ain't I have?
amongst y'all, who are.
TITLE: Tough enough
DATE: 2023 Feb 26
do not even need
to write poem about life
title says it all
TITLE: Threadbare chaos
DATE: 2023 Mar 3
NOTES: senryu poem
Birds in the springtime —
daredevilish in their quest
songful in their survival —
weightless wings — heavy risk
TITLE: Fell swoop
DATE: 2023 Mar 25
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
my willpower has become
a fraction of what it was—
my sweet tooth is now
much greater than my resolve—
and the laboratory reports
that my blood glucose
no longer measures in
milligrams per deciliter—
but in sugar cubes squared
TITLE: Sugar shock
DATE: 2023 Mar 26
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
God completed my heart
then you finished it —
mortal combat style
SOURCE: freewriting typewriter poem
DATE: 2023 Mar 26
Middle age is a heap of abandoned ideals.
TITLE: Lighten your load
DATE: 2023 Mar 26
AGE: forty-freaking-nine
i feel like the real me
is in a bottle of beer
the beer inside is me
and inside i am beer
TITLE: Huzzah.
SOURCE: freewriting typewriter poem
DATE: 2023 Jun 15
STATUS: tipsy
shards of memory
jagged-edged
broken emotions —
wholeness
is the fossil
of childhood —
growing up
fractures
many things —
TITLE: Fractal
DATE: 2023 Jun 23
we can see the air
praying monk choking in orange
begging for clean breaths
TITLE: Phoenix skies
DATE: 2023 Jun 23
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: senryu poem
lobotomy by sparrow beak
brain pecked full of dread
brimful society syrupy sweet
carelessness killing us dead
memoryvines creeping through
sockets of wasteland dreams
a humming vibration of stasis
stuck lid on boiling progress
jammed gears of regression—
a spinning orbiting rotation
would be movement at least
incessant click click click
of the going nowhere echoes
like fading robotic heartbeats
a constant why? why? why?
the most important question
that never even mattered
answerless, unanswerable
speedbumps of psychological
queries emerging like stones
in the body — stuck motion
mind eternally trying, failing
to write its story, click clack
bones, ligaments, thoughts
stutter sputter twitch to death
choking on ink overflowing
poems destined for somewhere
turned inward flooding nowhere
release my brain to infancy
for it is smothered with age
TITLE: Fixate
DATE: 2023 Jul 11
AGE: forty-nine
but the science bears out
my catastrophic thinking
TITLE: CBT
DATE: 2023 Jul 13
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
our apocalypse
once in ultra slow motion
now on fast forward
TITLE: Accelerant
DATE: 2023 Jul 13
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: climate change senryu
believing my wings were fragile and fractured
in my formidable forties, i abandoned flying—
approaching fifty, i know my wings are strong
they just cannot lift so many heavy anxieties—
TITLE: Liftoff
DATE: 2023 Jul 13
Please don't let the heat
melt all your hopes
Do not allow the world
to enflame your anger
Keep a cool head and
warmhearted spirit
Extinguish that cold-blooded
scorched-earth temper
TITLE: Burned-out
DATE: 2023 Jul 19
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: overnight low 97° F
the world we abuse
roasting us like marshmallows
in a fire we lit
TITLE: Inflame
DATE: 2023 Jul 22
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: climate change senryu
watching birds splash in
morning-after rain puddles
cleanses my spirit
TITLE: Finally a bath!
DATE: 2023 Jul 27
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
phoenix monsoon storm
haboob isn't dirty word
it is dusty though
TITLE: Writing up a storm
DATE: 2023 Jul 26
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: silly summer senryu
boom rustle tip tap
tippity clink rumble crack
whoosh whish shhh fade black
TITLE: Thunderstorm
DATE: 2023 Jul 26
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
monsoon winds tell tales
lightning dances thunder sings
rain is main event
TITLE: Opening night
DATE: 2023 Jul 26
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
a glance out into the night
you think you see a star
you get excited —
nope.
just another police helicopter
in the distance
TITLE: Big bright city
DATE: 2023 Jul 29
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
oh my gosh is that a star
in bright city sky?
nope! police helicopter
TITLE: City night
DATE: 2023 Jul 29
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: senryu poem
full moon monsoon clouds
glow pale light through windy trees
parched leaves shadow dance
TITLE: It's a dry heat streak
DATE: 2023 Jul 30
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
freed pubescent girl
finally crawls out of time
into middle age
TITLE: Perimenopause
DATE: 2023 Jul 30
AGE: forty-nine
NOTES: senryu poem
princess lightning reigned
it was a dark and stormy
knight to fall in love
TITLE: Storm story
DATE: 2023 Jul 30
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: silly senryu
for the harsh heat wave
wet apologetic gift
from clouds to tree roots
TITLE: Monsoon love
DATE: 2023 Jul 31
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
now almonds are not vegan?
humans are deadly—
bee abuse must stop!
we are killing ourselves too.
TITLE: Sickening
DATE: 2023 Jul 31
autumn leaves rustle
the tension out of me
on pleasant breezy days
sunlit gentle tree, i am
a ragdoll under your sway
TITLE: Entranced
DATE: 2023 Aug 1
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
America —
toxic profit
center of
the world
TITLE: $tate$ unIted
DATE: 2023 Aug 10
it is raining!
no, not water
from clouds
but dead leaves
from july trees
scorched by
a brutal heat
too sunburnt
to evergreen
falling, fallen
brittle brown
leafy teardrops
raining down
the dry warm
forlorn face of
mother earth
TITLE: Ravish
DATE: 2023 Aug 20
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
in nature i am
water in the breeze
going with the flow
in society i thrash
every cell halting
resistance grows
i become boulder
thrown off cliffs
accelerating through
no choice of my own
landing hard
splitting open
shattering into
everything wrong
TITLE: Rippling
DATE: 2023 Aug 20
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
sunset casts shadows
yet we see only colors
and glorious light
TITLE: Westerly
DATE: 2023 Aug 20
AGE: forty-nine
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: middle-age senryu
Don't judge this online book by its cover
Despite a retro look and tiny typography
It has better quotations than any other
And that's not a brag, it's true—literarily.
TITLE: The Quote Garden, 2023
DATE: 2023 Aug 22
how the nighttime looks
during a power outage
is how night should look
TITLE: Dark thoughts
DATE: 2023 Aug 31
LOCATION: PҺoenᎥᶍ ArᎥɀønα
NOTES: light pollution senryu
watching over the shoulder of patience
studying how he does his work
TITLE: Re-learning at 49
DATE: 2023 Sep 3
i am naked and spinning
unmasked and repenting
wasn’t i just fourteen
mere unwound hours ago
i breathed, i sang
a lyric or two, loudly
in my quiet voice —
cycled through colors
found beautiful hues
my butterfly wings
cripplingly morphed
to chrysalis again
— reflect retread —
growing wisdom in my head
thrust out the blonde hair
and that all the new
is gray matters not —
focus is a summit reached
rock bottom at the top
perimenopausal paradox —
if someone would listen
if anyone would care
from up here or down there
the invisible i have become
could unhide everted —
but what has burned out
is not the heart soul
bones mind or gut but
only the brittle shell
of youth — falling apart
shedding and crumbling
finally wasting far away
leaving a glowing
blossom unsplayed —
TITLE: Fading in
DATE: 2023 Sep 15
AGE: forty-nine
syl·la·bles in my life
i cannot utter anymore
with the grace of youth
i stutter with freedom
and slur in wild love
words that once made
sense now are blind
faith doesn’t see and
hope rarely speaks
i’ve never needed you
to spell it out for me
the echo of emptiness
calls out like the sea
ebbing flowing waving
crashing shoring up
a million tear drops
whisper gently into
the gossamer of years
winds blow away our
comforts of home in
a smoke of memories
lost childhood remains
both here and gone
audible and sadly silent
echoes of those poems
voice words that sound
exactly the same but mean
something entirely different
TITLE: Fading out
DATE: 2023 Sep 15
pick out your fears
worries, anger, and hate
from the bag of stones you carry
and love, find yourself lifted by
the wings of featherweight faith
TITLE: Carrying
DATE: 2023 Sep 15
age split a cherry
midlife is the pit
sweet and ripe surround
TITLE: Sweet life
DATE: 2023 Sep 16
squeeze tight, dollars drip
lay off loyalty, tears drop
squeeze tighter, cents bleed
TITLE: Servicing shareholders
DATE: 2023 Sep 21
currently i am about halfway through
doing the list of things i swore before
i would never ever do when i got old
TITLE: Don’t-do-it list
DATE: 2023 Sep 25
AGE: forty-nine
a poet’s job is to hurt
to feel — everything;
to suffer and bleed —
to hold it in; not heal
’til ink touches paper
TITLE: Angst-written
DATE: 2023 Sep 27
Terri Guillemets
Archives — 2023
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