The Quote Garden ™
“I dig old books.” ™
Quotations: “How True!”
Today is the longest day of the year—but anymore, every day is. ~Chuck Palahniuk, Diary, 2003
If an article is attractive, or useful, or inexpensive, they'll stop making it tomorrow; if it's all three, they stopped making it yesterday. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
Confucius say, man think happy, man about to step on banana skin. ~Jeffrey Ashford (b.1926), Loyal Disloyalty, 1996
Most people who have an opinion about everything have actually just one opinion that applies to everything. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
If there is something you must do and you cannot do it, you cannot do anything else. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
I tell you this, and I tell you plain:
What you have done, you will do again;
You will bite your tongue, careful or not,
Upon the already-bitten spot.
~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
Absurdity.— Any thing advanced by our opponents, contrary to our own practice, or above our comprehension. ~"Specimens of a Patent Pocket Dictionary, For the use of those who wish to understand the meaning of things as well as words," The New Monthly Magazine and Literary Journal, 1824
What you discover about life's shell game is that it's hardest to follow the pea when you're the pea. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
To know exactly what you want from life is to become a magnet to everyone who doesn't. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics. ~Author unknown
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark. ~Author unknown
The worst of plagiarists is he who says something which we could have said but didn't. ~"Poor Richard Junior's Philosophy," The Saturday Evening Post, 1903, George Horace Lorimer, editor
It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions. ~Author unknown
Natural talents in inanimate things —
Pencils — for getting lost.
Umbrellas — for getting stolen.
Money — for taking wings.
Petticoats — for blowing about.
Secrets — for getting known.
Lies — for getting believed.
~Charles Searle, Look Here!, 1885
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire. ~Cannon's Cogent Comment, quoted in 1,001 Logical Laws, Accurate Axioms, Profound Principles, Trusty Truisms, Homey Homilies, Colorful Corollaries, Quotable Quotes, and Rambunctious Ruminations for all walks of life, compiled by John Peers & edited by Gordon Bennett, 1979
People who snore always fall asleep first. ~Author unknown
Men have an irresistible impulse to believe that, so long as they see nobody, nobody sees them — like children who shut their eyes so as not to be seen. ~Georg Christoph Lichtenberg (1742–1799), translated by Norman Alliston, 1908
Perfume: any smell that is used to drown out a worse one. ~Elbert Hubbard
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. ~Author unknown
The trouble with, "A place for everything and everything in its place" is that there's always more everything than places. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
Victoria: What is your biggest pet peeve?
Lemony Snicket: The car alarm, as it has come to signify the opposite of its intention. When you hear a car alarm go off, you know that whatever is happening, the car is not being stolen.
~From a live Facebook chat hosted by Scholastic Reading Club, 2013 January 16th
No one is listening until you fart. ~Author unknown
So soon as a fashion is universal, it is out of date. ~Marie Dubsky, Freifrau von Ebner-Eschenbach (1830–1916), translated by Mrs Annis Lee Wister, 1882
You can shout it to every star,
Bare your soul up to the moon,
Cast your problems nightly afar—
But they always flood back by noon.
Interchangeable parts don't, leakproof seals aren't, and self-starters won't. ~Author unknown
It's my luck that every time I feel I completely comprehend God's plan, I don't have a pencil with me. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
Keep a thing seven years and it's bound to come in handy. ~Russian proverb
Warranty – A notice telling the buyer when the product that was just purchased will no longer function. ~Richard E. Turner (1937–2011), The Grammar Curmudgeon, a.k.a. "The Mudge," from "The Curmudgeon's Short Dictionary of Modern Phrases," c.2009
There is nothing more essential to getting a project off the ground than the underestimate. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
Everything I touch
with tenderness, alas
pricks like a bramble
~Issa (1763–1828), translated by Peter Beilenson & Harry Behn, 1962
There are men whom you will never dislodge from an opinion, except by taking possession of it yourself. ~Augustus William Hare and Julius Charles Hare, Guesses at Truth, by Two Brothers, 1827
I have never met anyone who wanted to save the world without my financial support. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
When a man STUMPS HIS TOE he cusses everything in creation 1st, then his toe, but never himself. ~Josh Billings, revised by H. Montague
Eventually you realize that certain people are never going to notice you, and certain others are going to find you no matter where you hide. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
Self-Checkout Line – The place where customers of an establishment become unpaid employees of the establishment. ~Richard E. Turner (1937–2011), The Grammar Curmudgeon, a.k.a. "The Mudge," from "The Curmudgeon's Short Dictionary of Modern Phrases," c.2009
There are things you do that come back to haunt you — and things that haunt you without ever leaving. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
I wish I loved anything as much as cats love walking on keyboards while you’re answering emails. ~Keith Wynn, @moon_descending, tweet, 2020
It's annoying to be disapproved of by people who know only half the story, especially when you're not sure which half they know. ~Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com
Last saved 2021 Mar 23 Tue 12:25 PDT